Using corporate buzzwords and phrases has its upsides, like better communication, streamlining processes, and even building rapport with clients. However, business lingo can make many employees crazy, especially when they hear or read these 14 office buzzwords.
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This phrase alerts you that workflows in the company change quickly and rapidly, so you need to be highly adaptable to the new circumstances. In other words, “You’ll be doing the work of two or three but only getting paid for one (barely).”
“We Are Looking for a Dynamic and Enthusiastic Team Player Who Is Confident and Adaptable”
The hiring manager might add, “Responsibilities include supporting senior leadership and taking responsibility for duties and workloads assigned. You’ll be a member of an exciting and fast-paced team, working in a challenging environment.”
So, what does such a job entail? “Pretty sure that’s code for ‘You won’t know what to do and will have to figure it out at the moment,'” says a poster.
We’re a Family Here
If they are a corporate family, translate that as “a big, inbred, misogynistic, dumpster fire of nepotism, cronyism, and incompetence masquerading as a business.”
It also means, “We will not respect your boundaries but expect you to bend to our every whim.”
Wear Many Hats
When a hiring manager tells you you will wear many hats, it means, “Do your job and other people’s jobs.”
Another cringeworthy corporate phrase is “You are not an employee, you are a partner,” yet “you will still basically make minimum wage.”
This “means they’re going to fire a bunch of people and dump all that extra work on those who remain.” So, you will either be on the team that loses their job or the other that gets double or triple the work.
When a company advertises they are looking for a rockstar, it’s not about guitars, a band, and performance.
“Rockstar is the word people use to describe someone who performs well but is underappreciated, underpaid, and overworked. If you are called a rockstar in a corporate work environment, think about why they are trying to flatter you,” points out a poster.
We Work Hard, but We Play Hard
You might not want to stick around when you hear this. “That means it’s an office of borderline alcoholics who do not have any respect for your off time,” says one poster. “Alcoholism and over time,” says another.
A lady who hates this term explains, “I am a woman who has to work for a living, not a girl boss. Also, I’m not a girl; I’m an adult.”
“I visibly cringe when I hear that,” admits a user. Other similar phrases are “put a pin on it, optics, and let’s unpack.”
A commentator who works in a Fortune 500 Company writes, “My company started using that term to signal job losses. ‘Synergies’ meant more work and fewer people.”
This buzzword is also thrown around in corporate sectors “like it is some newfound concept,” but always used incorrectly. Instead of scientists and engineers using the word in their field of technology and production, it’s the marketing people who promote their products with it.
Well, some corporates now use “resource as a synonym for a person,” as well as an asset or a body.
“I loathe that word,” reads a post. “Any quick change in how you operate is pivoting.”
“A.k.a, we pay you the lowest possible amount we can get away with,” clarifies a commentator. Not unless a competitive salary means “competing with a minimum age.”
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